Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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