I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
