OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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