omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
