Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
