used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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