Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
