god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
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