I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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