So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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