Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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