I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
