how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
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