You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
