God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
