dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account