Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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