im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
