Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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