No stitches, just platelets and will power
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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