normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
