I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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