Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
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