Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
