I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I think a kid would responsible me up
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize