i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
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I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
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The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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