that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
