Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
You're like the curious george of whores
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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