you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
