i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
