so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
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This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
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It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
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