He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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