its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
pop tarts are not kleenex
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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