Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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