Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
