You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Even my vagina gasped.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
