I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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