He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
This is my gift to your gina
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
