I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
