You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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