Three words: puerto rican gang bang
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
This house was built for laser tag.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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