Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
