Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
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I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
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Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize