she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
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