but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
