Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
