so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
