Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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