i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
