After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize